Single Outdoor Guy becomes a Partner and Father of 2 within 3 Years
So, I think I have written about 25 blog posts now in my new online blogging career and I haven’t really felt great about any of them yet. I think they are ok, and there is some good information, but nothing that really makes me want to yell out to the world that I have something Amazing!! This outdoor guy is bringing something different today.
I am changing it up a little and writing this one a little bit differently. You might say more from the heart. I’m going to dig in a little bit and talk about my family, how it grew quickly, and how it changed my camping and outdoor recreation life now and forever.
Why Should You Read This
So Why would you want to read this? If you are like me and thinking about having kids then I can give you a perspective on what it feels like to go from fishing,hunting,hiking,backpacking,camping,snowboarding,etc bachelor dude every week to trying to get just three trips in over the year. Now don’t get me wrong on how I feel about this, having kids and a family is amazing, but you have to be ready to give a lot and prepare for massive change.
Up to this point in my blogging history (4 months) my articles have been top 10 lists and how to’s and this week I am just going to write as though I am talking to you. I’m trying to find my voice so you are hearing the real me. The Dave with Davism’s (my friends came up with this one for some of the stupid/funny and sometimes inspiring words I spat out). Let me know if you hear a Davism somewhere.
I hope this one really resonates with you if you are thinking about having kids or just getting into it. I would be interested to hear how your camping experience has changed as a result of big changes in your life.
My Story
The topic I have chosen is a timely one for me because as we speak Megan and I just had our second child Alia, who is now 1 month old. I want to talk a little bit about my life before and after having our first child and how this affected my outdoor experience. I hope this gives those who might be thinking about having kids a little insight into what you might expect. We now have a 2 year old and a newborn.
Before our 1st child was born the amount of camping, hunting and fishing I did was way, way above what I do now. Now I have to add a significant point to this mix. Our daughter Juna, was born in June of 2012. My partner, Megan, and I starting dating in May of 2011. I know, it’s kind of crazy, but it just happened. I think I always knew I wanted kids and up to June of 2011 there was nothing in sight.
When Meg told me that day at the coastal cabin I was renting, my response was different than I would have expected. I was happy, excited and scared. I wasn’t screaming, running away or freaking out.
I wanted it, but never really realized it fully. We obviously weren’t planning it, but it just happened, as they say. I am writing this in July of 2014 and can tell you it hasn’t been easy. In fact, Meg and I just had a really difficult day. I am feeling pretty beat up from the arguing we put together. I can also tell you that I am working on growing myself each day and do it for my girls. We have two of them now and it’s amazing.
The Kid Effect
But let me get back into the effects of having these two kids and where I was at prior to meeting Megan. I thought pre 2011, that I had a pretty cool life. I was single and had some great friends that I went camping and fishing with all the time. In fact, that’s what I was always doing. Going on a camping trip and planning for the next one. Click here if you are thinking about going camping but need some guidance.
The funny thing is, you can never see what it is like or what you are missing when you are caught up in it. And I was caught up in it. It was easy. Change is hard, so I rarely did anything that changed it up much. What I know now is that change is when we really grow.
It’s when you can put yourself in a different place to enable you to change our life and the people around you. I am on such a different trajectory now and so excited, and all because I jumped in this with Meg and Juna was born. Where Juna was born on the banks of the river is a whole nother story.
There is a lot to do in preparation for a birth and after the birth. Now I know there are probably guys out there that don’t change their lives much after having kids because their partners either don’t care or they don’t care. They still go out with the guys the same amount of time as before and do the same stuff. Now that’s just not me. Don’t get me wrong here, I fought it at the beginning, wanting to get out and keep everything as it was before. I found that by letting it go and deciding that our children are the most important thing everything would work out fine.
I can tell you now that I do 3 of my big camping trips each year with the guys. I may have done 10-15 trips before jumping into the family.
What would I tell my single self Now
As I sit here now, I can tell you honestly that I am ok with it. The funny thing about it, I will probably get back up to that old 10-15 trip range, but will have my family along with me. Teaching them everything that I learned over the years and enjoying it even more. My journey up to this point with my new family has had huge ups and downs. I am not sure what tomorrow is going to bring, but know it will be more difficult and better because of my family.
What would I tell my single self back in early 2011. I would tell him to appreciate the freedom and outdoor journeys he has had and to prepare for better ones to come. As Pat Flynn would say: “My WHY is my family.” Well Pat, I can now say my why is my family as well. It’s why I want to produce something in my career that is valuable. It’s why I get up at 4:30 in the morning to work. It’s why I cut out almost all of my camping trips with the guys over the last 3 years. It’s why I wrote the article and why I hope the reader gets some benefit and enjoyment out of it.
Outdoor Guy Conclusion
I’ve gone from single outdoor guy, camping with the guys every weekend, to a full family in under 3 years. I only get out on my camping trips with the guys a fraction of the time now but am happier and a better person because of it.
Change can be an amazing thing. This change has made life more challenging but so much more rewarding at the same time. I will be a camping crazy person again, it will just take a little time to get back to the old level.
What type of changes have you made in your life over the last 3 years? Do you have anything you can share that might help the next person reading this feel good about making changes of their own? Speak your mind in the comments below.
oh, yah…….did you hate this style? Or would more of this be helpful? Be honest and let me know below.
I like the post. And feel the same way. Let’s get together with our families and go camping. – Denton
Thanks for the reply Denton. I’m glad to here some of it resonated with you. I would love to get together with the families and get out there. We were out camping this weekend with our 2 month old and it was a little challenging at times. But we found our groove on day 3 and all turned out pretty good.
Dave – I really enjoyed this style of post. It allows for a more personal connection and I like to learn from others’ experiences. Eventually, I’ll have a family of my own and I’m struggling with the thought of giving up the various freedoms. But you’re absolutely right, it’s just about changing your mindset and realizing that your most important priority is now your wife and kids.
Thanks for the post, and hey – I’d love to go on a camping trip with you someday!
Matt,
You have a deal. If I am in Hawaii or you make it to Oregon we will do a camping trip. Thanks for the comment as well. Writing good content that makes an impact on the readers is what it’s all about. Nothing else matters that much if we can’t do that. Although we all start at some beginning point, the more we write the better we get. So keep up with your writing and make something great.
dave
Great post! My husband and I are in the same boat, rediscovering camping with two little ones after many trips on our own. Good for you guys for getting out there with your daughters and teaching them about the outdoors. I look forward to seeing more of your work.
Thanks for such kind words. It is so much work at times, but so amazing and perfect at the same time with kids. The outdoors seems to mellow them a lot and we plan on doing more and more as they get older. Keep in touch!
I think it’s inspiring to hear how much you and Megan get the kids out camping. My boys are 8 & 6 now, and we have really only camped a handful of times. And rarely when they were young. Good on ya! I definitely need to get the boys backpacking this year. Thanks for the inspiration.
Thanks Buddy! We have been talking about maybe trying to get out backpacking for one night, but haven’t pulled the trigger yet. Maybe next summer we’ll be ready for it. I think we might be getting close to do an easy boating float trip next year as well.